Chapter 49 – Mortal Realm Asessments
Hurriedly, following my descriptions of the surrounding scenery from what I could remember, Xiaolin ran to go save Shao Zhong. He was already no longer dangling on the tree, not even his shadow could be seen. We could only return empty-handed, we sent some people to inquire about Shao Zhong’s Shifu Na Zha at the Third Dragon Prince’s court, but it turned out he had already returned, so we dropped this matter.
On the second day, I wanted to stay beside Bi Qingshen Jun at Xuan Qing Palace, but he did not agree with it, and wanted me to go to school. He said that to study properly and learn is a cat’s job, and that he has Xiaolin here to take care him no problem.
Jin Wen suggested, “The chance that something could go wrong if you stayed here is comparatively higher…..”
Therefore the me that was disdained could only dawdly rub and went to school with Wawa.
Before I even entered the door, I heard enthusiastic bursts of sound of laughter,
“From what I heard, you went to peek at the seven celestial maidens taking a bath, and was caught and hung on a tree for one full night?”
“Which fairy had the nicest body?”
“Shao Zhong you are so despicable! I was wrong about you!”
“I didn’t think there would be such a kinky thief at this demon school~ Hahahahaha~ Teacher Huang will definitely be so angry that his nose would become crooked!”
Shao Zhong came back? I hastily entered the classroom and wanted to ask what had really happened that day, but unexpectedly, he had already stood up with a cold face, and pounced towards Xiao Yao that was laughing the loudest, and then mercilessly chomped down.
That Xiao Yao should be of the bear family, his strength was quite formidable, and so the two kept biting each other back and forth. There was slapping and punching, causing the classroom to be turned upside down, there were scratches and scars all over, this really was an intense fight.
Wawa desperately pushed and pulled the me that was fascinated at the lively crowd, and called in panic, “Quickly get them to stop fighting, what do we do if they are hurt?”
I stepped forward, extended my hands and grabbed hold of each side, forcibly separating the two, and did not allow them to continue fighting.
The bear demon seeing that he was completely immobilized, shouted in anger, “You kinky thief! You actually dare hit your grandfather! Do you not want face any more?”
Shao Zhong gave me a vicious look, turned his head away, and then said in a nearly trembling voice, “I didn’t purposely go to take a peek, at that time, I went looking for that ugly Xiao Zi, and accidentally stumbled across the jade pond. As I was about to leave, those celestial maidens came in and started to take their clothes off, I wanted to immediately leave, but I was too late…..I didn’t expect them to call me a kinky thief, and they didn’t even listen to what I had to say and tied me up and hanged me from a tree.”
Xiao Yao made a ‘pei’ sound and then said, “Quit bluffing! Everyone here knows what is the truth and what is a lie.”
Shao Zhong did not continue to speak, he pushed away my hands, tidied the stuff on his desk, and then walked away in the direction of outside.
I quickly blocked his way, “Where are you going to play?”
“That ugly has not come back yet.”
Han Jing came next to him, smiled and said, “If you care about her so much, then don’t bully her so often.”
“You don’t even know, you are so hateful!” Shao Zhong turned around to give her a glare, and then turned to ask me, “The other day you were captured by those seven bastards, how did you escape them?”
I rubbed my head, and depressingly and simply told him everything that happened that day. I also expressed our hatred and dislike towards the celestial maidens, and we scolded them together, he finally told me his method for escape, “When you were captured, you had already loosened the ropes by quite a bit already, so I waited for a while, and then made a run for it.”
While we were in the midst of discussing about Xiao Zi disappearance, from outside the door came a joyful sound, “Miao Miao jiejie~ what are you guys doing?”
We turned our heads around and stared blankly, it was Xiao Zi standing at the door dressed very beautifully like she normally does, staring at us with joyful eyes.
Shao Zhong paused for a moment, and then shakily raised his head to ask, “You…..where did you go these past few days?”
Xiao Zi just simply ignored him, ran directly towards my left side, and then mysteriously took out a box from her hands and shoved it into mine, “This is a powder a got at the Jade Heavens Mountain Pass, it is very effective for your face and beauty, this is a present for you to try.”
I opened the box to give it a few sniffs, felt that it wasn’t too fragrant, so I accepted it and handed it over to Wawa, and then asked, “Wasn’t it because of your forehead injury that you went to commit suicide?”
“How is that even possible!” Xiao Zi opened her mouth wide, and asked in surprise, “Who said this kind of thing?”
Han Jing beside us raised her hand up and said, “I just casually took a guess, and it seemed that some idiot actually took it seriously.”
That idiot with soaring anger immediately pounced on top of Xiao Zi and yanked at her hair while saying, “You better tell me! Where have you gone these past few days?”
“Let go you idiot!” Xiao Zi hastily knocked his hands away, and loudly scolded, “It’s all because you big loser hurt my face! Thus I went to the Jade Heavens Mountain Pass with Bai Hua Fairy to look for herbs to rub with! I had to rub several days for it to heal! If you hurt my face again, then I will have nothing to do with you anymore!”
Shao Zhong took several deep breaths, and said while gritting his teeth, “So you are saying you were fine all along, and that you secretly went home to heal your wounds without even telling anybody?”
“Yeah.” Xiao Zi straightened her now messy hair, and asked in confusion, “Why would I need to tell you where I am or where I’ll be going?”
“Very good, very good, very good!” Shao Zhong said three very goods in a row, and then immediately turned his whole body around and went back to his seat. He did not bicker and argue with Xiao Zi for a the rest of the day.
After school, Xiao Zi expressed some doubts, and then curiously asked, “Something is not right with that bastard today? I heard that the other day he went to peek at the celestial maidens taking a bath?”
Her gossiping voice was a bit loud, and Shao Zhong face was flushed red, he left without looking back.
“So baffling,” Xiao Zi surreptitiously grabbed hold of my arms and asked, “How did I provoke him today? I haven’t even accounted for the time he wounded my face, so how could he…..”
I shook my head to expressed that I didn’t know, so she shrugged as well, and we did not press this issue any further.
So this pair of happy enemies, from this day forth, started to ignore one another, and Wawa had told me that this type of behavior indicated they will never be friends again.
Although I did not understand why they broke off their relations, but what I understood is that this is not good, because friends are important things. Therefore I tried my hardest to persuade them a few more times along with Wawa, but I did not expect that both parties would have such a stubborn nature, wanting the other to apologize first before forgiving the other, and even my apologies were useless…..
I had no other methods…..so I could only watch them, Xiao Zi played with me everyday, and Shao Zhong would also from time to time come play with us, just that these two people would not come find me at the same time.
And thanks to my bet with the Monkey King…..I did not eat fish for a whole month, Jin Wen had praised my sudden change in behavior, so she cooked roast chicken for me to eat everyday.
Bi Qingshen Jun’s injuries were also getting better, but Mo’lin says that he should stay in bed and rest for a while longer, so he did not attend the peach banquet. Even though I really wanted to go, when I heard that a was a feast that only had fruits, I instantly lost interest, but Mo’lin had hurriedly went.
When he came back, he told me that the Monkey King had turned the whole banquet into chaos, stole and ate High God Old Lao’s Pill of Immortality, and packed the leftover food and brought it back to the Mountain of Fruits and Flowers. This caused the Jade Emperor and Queen Mother to be extremely angry, sending heavenly soldiers after him to arrest him.
Logically speaking, Bi Qingshen Jun would also be sent, but due to his injuries, he had to rest in bed, so instead, Erlangshen Jun and Li Tianwang were sent to command the heavenly soldiers and capture him. But no matter what they did, they could not kill, and on the contrary, the Pill of Immortality had given him the Eyes of Piercing Insight.
In the end, the Buddha came forth, and sealed him beneath Wuhang Mountain, causing him to be unable to come out.
This story had also become a typical one amongst demon schools across the Heavenly Realm, to teach us that you mustn’t go to cause a disturbance and steal food from higher gods. And also mustn’t go out looking for trouble as heavenly rules can not be violated, or else you’ll be confined under Liuhang Mountain, Qihang Mountain, or even Bahang Mountain.
We all nodded our heads to show that we understood.
And in this way, several months had already quickly passed, school was also almost over, so Teacher Huang suggested one last task, to descend to the mortal realm and experience the everyday life of people for one month.
We must use are own hands and feet to earn money, and that would be considered passing.
Bai Cai was so excited she could not wait, she thought of all sorts of methods to earn money, Xiao Zi planned to open a stall to sell powders and blushes, Shao Zhong found a piece of cloth, turned it into a banner and was ready to do an entertainment show, and Han Jing intended to open a fortune-telling booth. Wawa and Jin Wen were here to accompany me, so they need not participate in this task…..
But…..me? I was just a single cat, what should I do? No stealing, no taking…..if I sell cut apples, would anyone buy it…..
If not, I could sell rats?